Girl With a Purpose (GWAP)

New Friends, Welcome!

I just want to say a warm, Jamaican hello to our new visitors from Ireland, Israel and Mexico!

We are so very happy to have you visit this blog!

Wi heart a leap fi 'ave yu visit wi! (Jamaican meaning, our heart is fluttering in its socket over having you visit us!)

At Girl With a Purpose Blog, we call you friend...you're not just a statistic to us, we value your thoughts and comments!

Please feel free to read the various posts and the sections we have on this blog and give us your feedback! (Just click on the Email me link at the bottom-right-hand-side of this blog, to do so!)

We would also love to hear how you've benefitted from this blog!

Please tell your friends,co-workers and family about us...we'd love to have them on-board! :)

Thanks in advance :).

Gillian

Thank You For Your Continued Support!

To all our friends at Girl With a Purpose Blog, we want to extend our deepest thanks and appreciation for your continued support of this blog!

To date, we have 1,617 unique visitors with 1,244 first time vistors and 373 return visitors...

Hip, Hip, Hurrah!!!! - we couldn't have done this without you!

As we strive to provide content that will empower and motivate you, please remember that you can affect the content we provide, by commenting on our present offerings (via the Comment link at the bottom of each post) and giving us feedback as to the content you'd like to see.

Please e-mail us at girlwithapurpose01@yahoo.com to give us your feedback. Or just click on the Email me link (under the "For Site Improvement Suggestions or Any Questions" heading) at the bottom, right-hand-side of this blog, to do so!

Thanks in advance :).

Gillian

Phone-Chat Suspect Arrested!

The following is a follow-up to our previous post, "Beware of Online & Electonic Predators".

The suspect in the murder of 25-year old, Patrice (Patricia) Clarke was arrested today. (Patrice was lured by her murderer, through a phone-chat service.)

While we are thankful that the police have quickly followed up on this case, please note that the man is a supect. He will have to be tried in a court of law, in front of a judge and jury and found guilty, to be called a murderer.

Beware of Online & Electronic Predators!

One woman was found dead today and another is still missing. The police and residents found the second woman's body, today, while searching for the first.

The second woman, 25-year old Patricia Clarke left her home on Saturday, January 20, 2006, to meet a man she had met via a phone-chat service. The same suspect is alleged to have killed the first woman, 27-year old Andrea Jackson, when she met him, allegedly to receive a gift from her boyfriend who is in prison.

The reason why I have mentioned these two cases is to help our young women to understand that not everyone you talk to via a phone call, a phone-dating service or an online dating service is who they say they are.

There are some real perverts and predators out there, who prowl the Internet and other tech-based-dating services for their next victims.

You must be very careful about revealing personal information about yourself online and via any tech-based dating service, as some dangerous people can use this information to steal your identity, as well as to hurt you, physically.

There are some precautions you can take to protect yourself, however.

These are:

Before the date:

1) Never use your real name or real e-mail addresses in your portfolios. - You can use Yahoo Mail or Hotmail to quickly create a phony e-mail address that you should use, specifically for these occasions.

2) Never give out your home address. - use generalities when describing where you live, like a city or an area described via an area code.

a) E.g. if in California, say you live in Cupertino, you don't have to be more specific than that.

b) E.g. if in Jamaica, you can say you're from Constant Spring - you don't need to get more specific than that.

3) Never give out your home phone number - the person, if a pervert, will be harassing you and your family, by frequent calling.

If it's a phone dating service, buy a special and cheap cellular phone and service plan for this occasion. If it's an online dating service - speak to this person via the communication methods set up by the online dating service. Don't have conversations outside of this medium until you've at least met this person, twice.

4) Listen to this person well, during your conversations or read this person's correspondence well, if writing via the online dating service.

a) Ask questions that will help you to size this person up, quickly.

E.g. you need to know if he smokes, drinks (you can verify the consistency of this by comparing what you observe or what he tells you with what he has posted in his profile) where he's from, where he grew up, family size, his work history, what he does for a living, what he values, where he went to school, how he views essential relationships like family, friendship and girlfriends; what his ambitions are, his favorite colors, when he was born, who his friends are, the type of friends he has and why.

You also need to know whether or not he loves animals, which ones he prefers and why/why not.  (I have found that people who dislike dogs and cats or animals in general, are not usually good people. If any of you have found this to be untrue, please let us know :).)

Get his views on money. Be careful of people who are greedy or will do anything to attain money or prestige.

Ensure that at least 2-3 conversations away, you ask some of these questions again. Listen for inconsistencies in the answers - these are warning signs that the person is either lying to you or being deceitful.

b) Listen out for previous occurrences of aggression... e.g. whether or not he has ever hit anyone- it's a warning signal. Aggression will be repeated, so watch out!

[No matter how the person denies that it will happen with you, aggressive behaviour is ingrained. Recent studies are showing that it is also genetic (passed on through generations of families.)

Aggression is very hard to get rid of, without prolonged therapy or a miraculous change in that person's life.]

c) Listen out for previous occurrences of drunken behaviour or other drug use and abuse - these are also warning signs. An addict will always be an addict, even if recovering...an addict is never recovered...when life's downturns occur it is very likely that he/she will go back to drug use.

On the date:

1) If things are progressing well online or via the phone (in terms of great and honest conversations) and you're comfortable enough with this person to meet this person for the first time, do not meet this person at your home or his. Meet in a very public place (with lots of sane people around :).)

2) Avoid meeting this person at a party - you want to have all your senses alert for this date. Also avoid alcohol on this date and the next few dates for this very said reason.

(Please do not leave your drink unattended for any time, this is how guys slip date-rape drugs into girls' drinks when they're not watching. If he is getting drinks for you, ensure that the drink is in it's original bottle, and unopened. Or better, yet, get your own drinks!)

3) Carry your father, brother, uncle, or a responsible male friend with you. He must blend in with the crowd. You must not alert your date re his presence. This person can sit two tables away from you while you wait at a nearby table for your date to arrive.

[Please carry an alpha male (one with aggressive tendencies or a very strong personailty :)) who is tall and at least medium-built in stature and much older than you, who can scare the potential pervert away.]

(Arrange with your relative/friend that you will give him a special code, during the date, if there is anything going wrong). You can both work out what that should be - it may be a phone call with a special code or something else that is easily communicated between the both of you.

4) Try to get to the venue of the date at least 30 minutes before your date arrives. This gives you the opportunity to observe him, from a distance. If you've told him, you'll be wearing specially-colored clothing - try to wear a different-colored jacket to conceal your blouse, so that you and your male relative/friend can observe this person, from a distance, before the date.

5) Watch to see if he brings anyone else along - either male or female. This is a warning sign.

6) Watch his demeanor, who he speaks to and how he interacts with these people - watch for signs of aggression or collusion, no matter how small.

[If at this stage you or your male family member/friend is uncomfortable about what you both observe, just walk away from the date and stop conversing immediately with this person (your date.)]

7) Watch how this person treats the people who serve you during the meal. If he is rude to these people, don't ignore this, he either is very ill-mannered or not properly brought-up. This is also another warning sign.

8) If you're uncomfortable in any way - trust your instincts. Give that special signal to the male you brought along - it's time for you to end the date and leave your date. Make up any excuse to leave safely without causing a confrontation. Leave with the male you brought along. Let your date see you leaving with the male and stop any further conversations with this person.

9) Do not get into your date's vehicle to go to any other spot to continue the date...you may never return home.

10) Always have your own means of transport to the venue of the date so that you can go there and return on your own.

11) Always pay for your own food (let him agree to this before the date), do not allow your date to pay for your food - if he's a pervert or a predator, he may feel you owe him something in return for him paying for the meal.

(If he wants you to pay for his meal as well, dump this guy! He's bad news!)

12) Do not invite the person to your home, no matter how great you think the date is going.

(Please carry your relative/friend with you for the first three (3) dates, or until you are sure you can trust this person to be alone with him on a date.

If there is any hint of uncomfortableness, during your conversations, please trust your instincts and end the budding relationship. Your instincts are usually right!)

I hope that this advice will be of great use to you in helping you to ward off potential perverts and predators...please let me know how helpful it has been, or if you have additional advice that you would like to share with us, ok?:)

Thanks in advance.

Gillian

News Report Sources:

1) Television Jamaica, 10:00 Nightly News, January 22,2007

2) Article, "Woman lured to death...Met killer through cellphone chatroom", Jamaica Gleaner, January 23, 2007.

Bashment Granny

There is a "roots" play now on at The Olympia Crown Hotel, called, "Bashment Granny". I tell you, I just have to laugh when I see the previews (snippets of those scenes fit for airplay) on TV.

(For our friends who are not familiar with the Jamaican lingo/language:

1) bashment = bling = fanciful person = hottie hottie.

2) granny = grandma)

The play is called a "roots" play because it appeals to people at the grass roots level. (These days a "roots" play also implies strong adult content).

Although the TV previews are a chuck-full-of-laughter -  I would never pay my money to see such a play.

Why?

Because, judging from the previews, there will be nothing garnered from seeing it...no upliftment... no contemplation, just 1 1/2 hours of smut and lewd behaviour.

The reason I'm mentioning this, is to show you the level that our entertainment in Jamaica, has sunk to.

From the 1700's to the early 1960's, plays used to be one of the few entertainment mediums we had - until the advent of the TV.

They not only reflected the mood of a nation, but were a means of social commentary, a chance to forget our struggles, if only for 2 hours, and a means whereby which life lessons could be learned.

Unfortunately every "roots" play appeals to the basal nature of us as humans and offers few opportunities for upliftment, serious contemplation or debate.

Mind you, "roots" plays have been around since the 1970's and have been doing pretty well (in terms of ticket sales). They have unfortunately proliferated because of the huge demand by Jamaicans who think at the guttural level and have a need for the reinforcement of that way of thinking.

There are still a few, great, decent plays around, though, two of which are:

1) The National Pantomime,"Howzzat", which is now playing at the Little Theatre, and will be playing until May, 2007. (For more information, please call the Little Theatre Movement at 1-888-991-2737).

2) "Cutie and the Freak", (a Jamaican re-make of the play, "Beauty and the Beast" ) now playing at Center Stage Theatre, from Wednesdays - Sundays. (For more information, please call Center Stage Theatre at 876-968-7529).

My humble advice - if you want great value for money, please go and see either, or both of these two plays...you'll be laughing and smiling for days and you'll have a lot to think about! :)

Gillian