Hmmh!
There are some people who pride themselves on being straightforward...they can look you in the eyes and tell you the truth...
That is, they "tell you like it is".
Forget tact...they leave it at home.
They feel the need to tell you their version of the truth, no matter what that truth is...as such they'd rather just tell you what they feel,in order to get things off of their chest and move on with their lives.
And anyone is fair game...be it family, friend or boss.
Well, I believe that you should always strive to tell the truth...but unfortunately, most people cannot handle the plain truth.
And this is very important for our girls and young women to understand...
You may know the truth...but you have to be very careful re how you say it.
The truth should be said, in such a way, that the person being told, is the better for it.
If you can't do this...then it's better to hold the truth in.
A prime example is your boss.
There are some bosses who will ask you for an honest review of their work and their approach to it. In some organizations it is mandatory that you review your boss's performance. It's a part of the Performance Evaluation Process (PEP) - your boss/supervisor evaluates you and you evaluate him/her.
(Your boss' evaluation is seen and judged by his/her superiors further up in the organization.)
Please ensure that when asked to do a Performance Evaluation/Appraisal of your boss, you ask if this is standard for each employee and ensure that the measures employed are consistent within the department, division, or company.
Please be fair during the Performance Evaluation Process.
This is not the time to get back at your boss...believe you me, offices are very small places...even when they are thousands of miles apart...people are involved in webs of relationships that you may not be aware of.
You need to be fair in your evaluation and be sure that you can back-up statements made, with evidence.
Even when there are glaring negatives about your boss's approach to his/her work and/or the people whom he/she supervises, there must be one positive thing that you can say about your boss.
This is your opportunity to say it.
You see, young friends, one day you will be the boss and like it or not...the higher up you go in an organization...the more you are envied and disliked...
Some people can't wait to make you fail...while others are anxious for you to succeed. :)
Bosses are well aware of this and this reality makes some bosses very fickle.
A very negative and unbalanced evaluation can get you fired...eventually.
You need to learn to give constructive criticism from very early in your career....that is, the truth, intermingled with how the person can improve.
This will be a great tool for you to use when working with your co-workers and team members, as this is a great way of encouraging them to give of their best to you, as a co-worker and to the organization as a whole.
So the next time that you are tempted to "tell it like it is", think twice and then think twice again.
If there is any doubt that the truth will hurt...hold it in until you can couch it in a way, that will actually help the other person improve.
Nuff said. (Jamaican meaning, enough has been said.)
Please read, "Telling It Like It is (Part 2)" , to see how we should treat our friends, should we wish to keep them. :)
(I would like to thank Lionel Bodilis for the use of his inset Flickr photo above.)
Gillian